
It wasn't always easy being me.
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I learned to survive my early life experiences by being "nice" instead of honest about how I felt and what I needed.
This "worked" when I was a kid in the 80's, yet left me feeling alone, depressed, suicidal, and afraid to be myself. I (sadly) subconsciously believed, "If I'm honest, I won't be loved."
As an adult, this pattern of "niceness" led me down a dark path of unspeakable traumas, challenging relationships, and immense pain.
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It wasn't until I had to fight for my life and stopped being "nice" that I started to break free.
I learned that the opposite of "nice" isn't "mean" ... it's kind.
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Kindness is a two-way street that considers both parties, including yourself.
Can you be polite? Sure. That's not what I'm talking about when I say "nice." As a trauma response, "nice" is forgoing your own wants/needs to stay in control in a relationship or situation.
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After 12+ years of working with women around the world, I realized how deeply this trauma response and conditioning vastly impacts our lives.
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(Read more about what I learned in my blog post here.)
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In 2022, I set out to write my first book called, "Nice Trauma" -- I started conducting research interviews and complimentary coaching sessions for the purpose of fully understanding how this (and other trauma responses) affect our ability to feel whole, be at peace with ourselves, and communicate confidently in relationships.
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During this time and continuing forward, I've paused my 1:1 sessions to focus on this research. In the meantime, I'm facilitating group healing circles and am building content for the continuation of this work.